To Whom it may concern,
Fitarella will be out sick today and under doctor’s orders has been sent back to bed. If you need to contact her please leave a comment below or email her. I tried taking away her laptop, but she bit me, so I’m sure she will be sneaking you a reply when I’m not looking.
Best,
Mr.Fitarella
Mint Mocha Chip Frappuccino® blended coffee with Chocolate Whipped Cream.
Classic chocolate and spearmint flavor combined with Starbucks coffees and milk, mocha sauce, Frappuccino® chips, blended with ice, and then topped with chocolate whipped cream and mocha sauce.
3:30pm
At office
him: “Surprise! It’s the NEW Mint Mocha Chip Frappuccino from Starbucks!”
me: “does this mean you think my ass is getting too small?”
him: “Oh just drink it! You work hard, you deserve a treat once in a while.”
me: (eyeing the creamy whipped goodness) “Well, thank you, that was really thoughtful.”
him: “enjoy!”
background: slurp, slurp, gulp, slurp, snort, inhale, gulp, snort, slurp, exhale
3:45pm
me:”heydidyougetthatarticleisentyouontheITFrameworkIt’sreallygoodreadit
studyitlearnitloveitSethjustaskedmeifiwasworkingthepolewiththeseshoeslater
pssh!hewishes”
him: “are you ok?”
me: “ofcoursei’mokwhatdoyoumeanIgottagowrapthingsuptheni’mofftoa
voicelessonciaoandreadtheartcleyou’lllikeit!”
4:00pm
At voice lesson (*side note- I sing opera and plan on being an International Opera Diva one day, adored by all)
maestro: “slow down! breathing is too shallow today. do it again!”
5:00pm
Driving home
me: “whatta headache…so sleepy”
5:30pm
home
me: “hi family, love you. Ok honey, A. (daughter) & I will be in here doing a puzzle”
6:00pm
A: “dad! mom fell asleep on my puzzle!”
6:15pm
dad: “C’mon J, off to bed you go”
5:45am
me: “Ack! I never freakin heard my alarm!(*usually up at 4am) there goes my run! crap! did I sleep the whole night? shit, i had so much stuff to do! Grrrrr!”
Moral: Mint Chocolate Chip Frappuccino = sugar induced coma
was it worth it?
HECK MOTHA-FREAKIN YEAH!!!
I love to eat. I really, really do. And this time of year I tend to overdose on some foods in particular because they yell talk to me more. The overdosing usually happens every few weeks so no one yummy feels left out. It’s a ‘yackety-yak’ rotation. And what do they say to moi? They say ‘Jacq, EAT ME NOOOOW and EAT ME GOOD!’ (really, they do.) So to celebrate my food freaks friends, I share with you this week’s blabber-mouths:
Avocado - so creamy and buttery. alone, in a salad, in a wrap, or alone, or alone, or alone. This fatty has me whipped!
image by nate
Persimmon (Sharon Fruit) - I was first introduced to this sweet fruit when I lived in Brazil. They call it ‘Caqui’ (yes, sounds like the other word for doo-doo). At first the name threw me off…you want me to eat crap fruit? But when the farmer’s market in front of my apartment wouldn’t go away I succumbed to it’s goodness. Now I am the goddess of shit caqui!
image by bren
Asparagus - the good news is its a good source of folic acid, potassium & dietary fiber. The bad news is it makes your pee stink!
Don’t eat it on you know, that date.
image by snavarro
Chick Peas (Garbanzo beans) - I eat these suckers out of the can on most days. They are high in protein and are great alone, in salads, as a side dish, or hummus. Ok, don’t be grossed out, but I love to dump a can in a dish, heat in the micro for 2 minutes, then smash them all up
and mix with a little ketchup. Oh, don’t say Eeeew! You know you have that one weird food thing you do that no one knows about! and I bet all of you are now going to make yourselves some micro-mush-ketchup-chickpeas.
image by blackmoon
Almonds - another good fatty! I love the satisfaction I get from the crunch. It’s like biting into a Godiva chocolate bar, only not.
image bygreencolander
Dried Mango (natural air dried, w/o sulphur) - Ugh, these things are so addicting! It’s all the sweetness of a fresh mango but without getting the hairs stuck in your teeth!
Tune in next week for more possessed food on my rotation.
It’s tight-ass Tuesday (and the crowd goes wild). Time to get that mushy tushy into gear! Here are some exercises to get ya going. I’ll be doing these never later:
LUNGE JUMP
LUNGE JUMP off the bench
STEP UPS
SQUAT JUMPS SIDE TO SIDE
SQUAT JUMPS W/WEIGHT
Did you know May 11th kicks off National Womens Health week? I didn’t, but thanks to MizFit now I do (thanks lady!). The NWH week empowers women to get healthy by TAKING ACTION! (where’s my lasso?) So to ignite all of our engines, they are offering a FREE 8 week challenge. It encourages women & girls to walk 10,000 steps or get 30 minutes of moderate exercise every day. So I have started a team called “FITARELLAS” and would love for you to join me! All you have to do is register here and then join my team or you can email me your name after you register and I will add you to the team. So, whatta ya waiting for? GET MOVING and JOIN ME NOW!
***To find Team Fitarellas look under Massachusetts (the look up is by state)
My 6 mile run this morning was ugly. First it started raining. Normally that would be ok, but in the spring, whenever it rains my allergies get BAD. Someone once told me that it was because the rain brings everything up and spatters it all about. Well, whatever the reason, once I started sneezing I couldn’t stop. And sneezing does not lend itself to good running breathing. And I had no tissues so I was forced to sleeve it. THEN about halfway into the run my stomach started gurgling. Not because it was hungry, but because it was trying to tell me that it needed to get rid of last night’s dinner. Ugh. Since I was halfway i had two choices: to walk (which would take too long) or just run it out and squeeze my ass shut (no where to stop because I run at 4:30am and everything is closed. I coulda bushed it, but nothing to wipe with) So I ran. Wanting to scratch my eye balls out and with crap coming out of both ends, I ran, therefore I am.
C’mon ya’ll. Let’s hear it, I know you got some nasty stories for me.
*image courtesy of Brooke Novak
My hump day rant: How hard is it to clean off the piece of equipment you just used at the gym for the next person? Not a trick question. and not hard. AT ALL! Grossey McGrossgross went all about the gym this morning sweating all over the equipment and NOT cleaning it off afterward. BLECH! I’m funky enough on my own, I don’t need/want someone else’s yuck. And Grossey didn’t do it to just one machine (although one is far too many), but FIVE different ones! Needless to say Fitarella had to have a little talk with Grossey McGrossgross about gym etiquette and cleanliness. I used to teach & train clients at this gym so I feel especially comfortable with talking to members about such things. But it made me wonder how many other times this person had done it before and how many people just watched and never said anything. Or maybe they did tell the front desk, but no one followed up…People, if you see this stuff happening, speak up! It’s your gym too and you pay good money to be there. So don’t go letting these funkdafiers get away with it! JUST SAY NO TO DA FUNK!
So, the lesson is ALWAYS spray & wipe down machines BEFORE use (’cuz ya never know what the funk is on there) and AFTER for the next person. The end.
*Note*- What a coinkydink! Just saw this online article about gym etiquette in Experience Life Magazine. Hadn’t heard about the mag until today - thanks MizFit!
*image courtesy of Lisa Tozzi
Not here dear ones. Mama is heads down reading & writing, trying to catch up on school work (yes, I’m back in school furthering my education so I can be super smart when i grow up - can you say WORLD DOMINATION?! *insert evil laugh*) I have a slight issue with procrastination. I keep meaning to work on it, but I never seem to get around to it for some reason…hmmm.
Anyway, here are some cool places to go to keep ya’ll busy while I write up a case analysis for my Organizational Behavior & Leadership class:
Wanna win a new bike? or better yet, help me win a new bike? Go here!
Need a new bicep exercise to spice up those boring curls? MizFit has got the answer. She makes the neatest little videos and is super buff. Some day I’ll get up the nerve to make neat little videos too.
Need some advice on how to start a running program? Go here and just do it! Rachel knows her shit.
Christine over at Live Passionately is the real deal and always inspires me to think about what I can do to lead a fuller & more satisfying life. Who doesn’t want that?!
Don’t tell anyone, but i’m into some kinky stuff. Yeah baby, check out these hot shots. Food porn at it’s finest.
Do you Know how to train with your own body weight? All ya need is you!
Need a cocktail? I know I do. Check out this “healthy” alternative.
I’m giving away a FREE copy of The Nonrunner’s Marathon Guide for Women: Get Off Your Butt and On with Your Training
*image courtesy of Austin Evan
Please support my NYC Marathon run for Kids Cancer Research!
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